• Elizabeth Upshur

Why Did God Make Chocolate?

Updated: Sep 28

Why did God make chocolate?


One of my five-year-old boys asks me during lunch, oozing

nutella on the table from his graham cracker sandwich. I explain to Judah

who is my favorite—also the worst boy in the summer camp—well, chocolate comes from beans on trees called ‘cacao’ and they all say eww! and gross! Judah glares at his Lunchable

like it has personally betrayed him, while our only three-year-old Andrew shrieks, I’m

ALLERGIC to legumes!


Judah has asked me why

Ram’s eyes are small, how can his mother be white?

and why are you brown like a crayon?

I said because some people are chocolate and some people are vanilla

but both are good, and thank God no one decided to shout how much

they hated vanilla or chocolate.


Because of course they don’t say, they shout.

Now he has me curious on why chocolate was invented.

The bitter cacao beans are boiled, stirred smooth with rich, creamy butter

and sugar like a sword, beaten, cooled, beaten down until every imperfection has

evaporated and all that remains on the wax paper is smooth chocolate.

I remember licking the bowl of my birthday cakes, the chocolate

coating my nose and sticking to my baby hairs

as I dived into the eight-cup glass.


I figure now, as a grownup who celebrates Wine Down Wednesdays

God made chocolate because he thought it would pair well

with strawberries and champagne.




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